Fearless

Bum, bum bummmm. 2000 pageviews! Yaaay. And then I think about how many people just click and close, and then I'm like lol. There are probably only 500 actual pageviews in those 2000. It's okay, children, it satisfies me.

First things first. I took my neuro101 test today that I was stressing about this weekend. Let me take you through my mental processes as the hour and a half of the test progressed.

5 minutes before 
Ahh, this is going to be so hard... Let me just look over my stuff one last time and get off Facebook..

10 minutes into test
Ehh, don't feel so great about that one. I'll just skip this for now.

30 minutes into test
Okay, I sort of know this. This isn't too too bad...

An hour into test
Okay I feel good about this. Not as bad as last time for sure. Let me go finish those questions I skipped. Google, help me.

15 minutes left till end
SHIT, I PUSHED THE BACK BUTTON. NONONONO. ALL ANSWERS GONE. HAVE TO FILL EVERYTHING IN REALLY QUICKLY.

9 minutes left till end
Okay okay almost done, this is still okay.

8 minutes left till end
....*@%?@$& FFFFFF WENT BACK AGAAAAIN NOT ENOUGH TIME TO REDO. *sends an urgent email to prof asking for a 20 minute extension*

End of test
DIDN'T FILL IN ANY SHORT ANSWER #$*#&* SHITSHITSHIT.

Opening a new exam window to rewrite and resubmit all answers
Okay okay, there are nice people in the world, I'm sure she'll just grade this one, right? RIGHT?

Resubmitted answers, end of test
*re-email prof asking if she can grade the second test*
*obsessively checking email for response*

And that was the story of my second college Neuro101 test. Luckily, my prof emailed me back later and said she would grade the second test and not to worry. Thank you so much.

You know how I'm always talking about really depressing and deep things? I figured this time I'd talk about something happy: laughter! I had to write a paper for my Neuro class as well for today and we had to propose a topic for a follow up experiment from an article we read. The article I read was on the neural correlates of ticklish laughter, aka what parts of the brain are activated  when you're tickled. My follow up experiment that I decided to write about was on how different types of induced laughter affects memory. It sounds kind of smart, but lol jk it's not really. Anyway, I read up a lot about laughter and realized that I really should laugh more. You know how they say "laughter is the best medicine?" Well, now I understand the actual neuro behind it and I believe it. Laughter is really good for you, so do it a lot. Did you know there are "clubs" in India of old people who meet early in the morning in parks to just laugh? I've seen it when I was there. It's the greatest thing ever. You'll live longer, you'll remember more, and it'll be easier to learn things. Do it, it works. Laughing is such a great feeling and if it's good for you, why not just do it? Apparently, even just faking smiling or laughing makes you feel a little bit better. I'm going to try it out and see how things go. Optimism ftw. Yaaay.

I was on the bus coming back from class a half hour ago and I started thinking. I do that a lot. I started thinking and I decided that I want to support the idea that perfection does not exist. It's simply an abstract concept of the mind to describe what each of us ideally desires. There are no such things as perfect circles, perfectly iced cupcakes, perfect people. Perfection is subjective, just like a lot of other things. Right and wrong is subjective, beauty, intelligence, tastiness, level of spice. (You can tell I'm getting hungry.) So I guess I don't really have a point except maybe that you shouldn't expect anyone or anything to be perfect (like I do, sometimes). It won't be. Well, it might be. It might be perfect for you. Also, don't expect yourself to be perfect. I used to do that a lot sometimes too: I wanted everyone to like me and wanted everything about me to be likeable and adjustable to everyone. Reality check: that isn't possible. Take what you can get, be the best you that you can be. Perfection doesn't exist. No one and nothing is flawless. Embrace it.

The new thing that I tried yesterday was coffee. I got a caramel macchiato right before my work study job because I had just gotten out of orgo and I was so. tired. And let me tell you something about coffee: it sucked. Ima embrace it, I'm not a coffee person. I didn't really like how it tasted and it made me MORE tired. I fell asleep while looking at plant roots under the laser microscope! Ten minutes later I got up and I thought, wow, I'm never drinking coffee again. Lolol. But actually.

I need more photos.

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